Patriotism Canada
Coldism -- The Canadian Way. - Patriotism Canada

Maple Leaf

Send in jokes, quotes, or information to Patriotism Canada

Canadian Quotes

Here is a collection of quotes about Canada that are amusing, entertaining, patriotic, or thought provoking. My hope is that you enjoy reading them, and they make you feel pride. We are going to start off nice and easy with quotes from celebrities.

Celebrities and Icons

Canadians . . . have no south of which they can speak warmly.
Priit J. Vesilind, National Geographic

When they said Canada, I thought it was up in the mountains somewhere.
Marilyn Monroe, actress

I had no idea Canada could be so much fun
Bruce Willis, actor

I wouldn't let someone take my Canadian citizenship from me for anything
Jim Kale of the Guess Who

They must be doing something right up there in Canada.
Hugh Hefner, Playboy Founder

Comedians

After all, we fought the Yanks in 1812 and kicked them the hell out of our country -- but not with blanks
Farley Mowat (1921-)

The US is our trading partner, our neighbour, our ally and our friend... and sometimes we'd like to give them such a smack!
Rick Mercer, "This Hour Has 22 Minutes"

Politicians and other criminals

Prime Ministers and Premires

For me, pepper, I put it on my plate.
Jean Chrétien

If I say I'll do something, I make sure I do it... There will not be a promise that I will make in the campaign that I will not keep!
Jean Chrétien

I'm not going to play politics on the floor of the House of Commons.
John Turner

I am so excited about Canadians ruling the world.
John Diefenbaker

I am a Canadian, free to speak without fear, free to worship in my own way, free to stand for what I think right, free to oppose what I believe wrong, or free to choose those who shall govern my country. This heritage of freedom I pledge to uphold for myself and all mankind.
John Diefenbaker (From the Canadian Bill of Rights, July 1, 1960.)

We shall be Canadians first, foremost, and always, and our policies will be decided in Canada and not dictated by any other country.
John G. Diefenbaker

Our hopes are high. Our faith in the people is great. Our courage is strong. And our dreams for this beautiful country will never die.
Pierre Trudeau

Americans should never underestimate the constant pressure on Canada which the mere presence of the United States has produced. We're different people from you and we're different people because of you. Living next to you is in some ways like sleeping with an elephant. No matter how friendly and even-tempered is the beast, if I can call it that, one is effected by every twitch and grunt. It should not therefore be expected that this kind of nation, this Canada, should project itself as a mirror image of the United States.
Pierre Trudeau

Canada is a country whose main exports are hockey players and cold fronts. Our main imports are baseball players and acid rain.
Pierre Trudeau

I just think you Westerners should take over this country if you are so smart.
Pierre Trudeau

We peer so suspiciously at each other that we cannot see that we Canadians are standing on the mountaintop of human wealth, freedom and privilege.
Pierre Elliott Trudeau

Whether we live together in confidence and cohesion; with more faith and pride in ourselves and less self-doubt and hesitation; strong in the conviction that the destiny of Canada is to unite, not divide; sharing in cooperation, not in separation or in conflict; respecting our past and welcoming our future.
Lester Pearson

As we enter our centennial year we are still a young nation, very much in the formative stages. Our national condition is still flexible enough that we can make almost anything we wish of our nation. No other country is in a better position than Canada to go ahead with the evolution of a national purpose devoted to all that is good and noble and excellent in the human spirit.
Lester Pearson

We have it all. We have great diversity of people, we have a wonderful land, and we have great possibilities. So all those things combined there's no where else I'd rather be.
Bob Rae

MPs (Female)

'Yes, if I were dead.'
Agnes Macphail (when asked if they would say nice things about her if she were dead)

'I'm no lady. I'm an MP.'
Agnes Macphail

'Patriotism is not dying for one's country, it is living for one's contry. And for humanity. Perhaps that is not as romantic, but it's better.'
Agnes Macphail

Brits and Americans

Canada is the linchpin of the English-speaking world.
Sir Winston Churchill

There are no limits to the majestic future which lies before the mighty expanse of Canada with its virile, aspiring, cultured, and generous-hearted people.
Sir Winston Churchill

I don't even know what street Canada is on.
Al Capone, US ganster

In a world darkened by ethnic conflicts that tear nations apart, Canada stands as a model of how people of different cultures can live and work together in peace, prosperity, and mutual respect.
Bill Clinton

Writers

A Canadian is someone who knows how to make love in a canoe.
Pierre Burton, historian

The great themes of Canadian history are as follows: Keeping the Americans out, keeping the French in, and trying to get the Natives to somehow disappear.
Will Ferguson

Many Canadian nationalists harbour the bizarre fear that should we ever reject royalty, we would instantly mutate into Americans, as though the Canadian sense of self is so frail and delicate a bud, that the only thing stopping it from being swallowed whole by the US is an English lady in a funny hat.
Will Ferguson

With or without the Royals, we are not Americans. Nor are we British. Or French. Or Void. We are something else. And the sooner we define this, the better.
Will Ferguson

I read and learned and fretted more about Canada after I left than I ever did while I was home. I absorbed anything I could on topics that ranged from Folklore to history to political manifestos... I ranted and raved and seethed about things beyond my control. In short I acted like a Canadian.
Will Ferguson

Canada is one of the planet's most comfortable, and caring, societies. The United Nations Human Development Index cited the country as the most desirable place in the world to live. This year a World Bank study named Canada the globe's second wealthiest society after Australia.
Time magazine

Anonymous and Others

Give your head a shake. This is the greatest country in the world.
Curtis Sanderson (From the Rant & Roar Forums)

What is a Canadian? A Canadian is a fellow wearing English tweeds, a Hong Kong shirt and Spanish shoes, who sips Brazilian coffee sweetened with Philippine sugar from a Bavarian cup while nibbling Swiss cheese, sitting at a Danish desk over a Persian rug, after coming home in a German car from an Italian movie... and then writes his Member of Parliament with a Japanese ballpoint pen on French paper, demanding that he do something about foreigners taking away our Canadian jobs.
Anonymous

God Bless America, but God help Canada to put up with them!
Anonymous

He shall have dominion also from sea unto sea, and from the river unto the ends of the earth.
Psalm 72

Unclassified

Canada is an interesting place - the rest of the world thinks so, even if Canadians don't.
Terence M. Green

Canadians are the people who learned to live without the bold accents of the natural ego-trippers of other lands.
Marshall McLuhan

Canadians have an abiding interest in surprising those Americans who have historically made little effort to learn about their neighbour to the North.
Peter Jennings

I think every Canadian should have a map of Canada in his or her house. It should be displayed in a place where one can sit and contemplate the wonderful vastness of this land. As Canadians we are continuously groping for an identity and a sense of love for our nation. We grapple with the concept, find it somewhat distasteful and leave it for another day. We find American flag waving, hand over heart while belting out Oh, say, can you see... too much and avoid doing the same. We admire their national spirit, but Canadians are, in contrast, understated. To understand the identity that exists in our hearts think of our sweepingly majestic home, its quiet, serene beauty. A beauty recognizable to us all. We are proud of this nation and of who we are. We just don't say it. It's like the map. It just sits there on the wall displaying the lines of our coasts, the bulk of our waterways, and the breadth of our northern territories. Surveying all of this leaves me in awe. It brings a tear to my eye...O Canada...
Debora O'Neil

It is the task of the rising generation of Canadians to create a new confidence and a new sense of cultural and civic duty in Canada. Unless we achieve some success on this front, and I believe we are beginning to do so, the very real attractions of the vigorous society to the South of us may attract too many of our able people. Then the human resources and skills required to shape and direct a complex industrial economy will simply not be available to us in Canada.
Mitchell Sharp

It is wonderful to feel the grandness of Canada in the raw, not because she is Canada but because she's something sublime that you were born into, some great rugged power that you are a part of.
Emily Carr

Canadians have been so busy explaining to the Americans that we aren't British, and to the British that we aren't Americans that we haven't had time to become Canadians.
Helen Gordon McPherson

Canadian nationalism is a subtle, easily misunderstood but powerful reality, expressed in a way that is not to state directed - something like a beer commercial or the death of a significant Canadian figure.
Paul Kopas

Vive la Canada. This country is not for sale.
Don Sweet

We are lucky to live in a country as rich as ours. To break it apart would be asinine in the highest degree.
Barry Gerding

We'll explain the appeal of curling to you if you explain the appeal of the National Rifle Association to us.
Andy Barrie

In only a century and a quarter since Confederation, Canadians have shaped out of the North American wilderness one of the most privileged societies on the face of the earth. Ranking among the seven most prosperous nations in the world, Canada is rich not only in the abundance of our resources and the magnificence of our land, but also in the diversity and the character of our people. We have long been known as one of the most tolerant, progressive, innovative, caring and peaceful societies in existence.
The Will of a Nation: Awakening the Canadian Spirit by George Radwanski & Julia Luttrell

When I'm in Canada, I feel this is what the world should be like.
Jane Fonda

Canada is a place of infinite promise. We like the people, and if one ever had to emigrate, this would be the destination, not the U.S.A. The hills, lakes and forests make it a place of peace and repose of the mind, such as one never finds in the U.S.A.
John Maynard Keynes

You Canadians have given us such hope to carry on. We admire your bravery. You are the neighbour of such a rich, powerful country, and yet you don't mind clashing with them. Well, that gives us more confidence.
Pedro Gutierrez

I am deeply moved by the warmth and courage of the Canadian people which I felt so strongly during my recent visit to your country. Your support of the struggle against apartheid restored me in my journey home and reassured me that many just people around the world are with us.
Archbishop Desmond Tutu

Canada is probably the most free country in the world where a man still has room to breathe, to spread out, to move forward, to move out, an open country with an open frontier Canada has created harmony and cooperation among ethnic groups, and it must take this experience to the world because there is yet to be such an example of harmony and cooperation among ethnic groups.
Valentyn Moroz

The beaver, which has come to represent Canada as the eagle does the United States and the lion Britain, is a flat-tailed, slow-witted, toothy rodent known to bite off it's own testicles or to stand under its own falling trees.
June Callwood

You look at the history -- the aboriginal people welcomed the first settlers here with open arms, fed us and took care of us ... that continues today, we welcome people from all nations to come in and share.
Peter Stoffer

We are tremendously proud of our cultures, heritage and achievements and we will continue to break new ground. I am proud to be a Canadian and I hope you are too.
Philip K. Lee

I always thought of this as God's country.
Jack Granatstein

As far as I'm concerned, I wouldn't want to go to any other country. It's good enough here.
Orviel Kruse

If you don't think that your country should come before yourself, you can better serve your country by livin' someplace else.
Stompin' Tom Connors

There are more left-handed Mormon streakers in the West than there are western separatists.
Mel Hurtig

The crisis of Canada today is the combination of economic problems facing us and the increasing impotency of governments that lack either the will or the resources to do much about it. The tragedy of Canada today is that just when we need a country that's pulling together in common cause, we have one that keeps finding new ways to pull itself apart.
Angus Reid

In any world menu, Canada must be considered the vichyssoise of nations, it's cold, half-French, and difficult to stir.
Stuart Keate

Canada has never been a melting-pot; more like a tossed salad.
Arnold Edinborough

It's going to be a great country when they finish unpacking it.
Andrew H. Malcom

For many years Canada has held an obscure place among the countries of the globe. Our borders have been pictured as the abode of perpetual snows, and our people as indifferent, easy-going, indolent. But change is taking place.
Charles R. Tuttle

Canadians, like their historians, have spent too much time remembering conflicts, crises, and failures. They forgot the great, quiet continuity of life in a vast and generous land. A cautious people learns from its past; a sensible people can face its future. Canadians, on the whole, are both.
Desmond Morton

The huge advantage of Canada is its backwardness.
Marshall McLuhan

Canadians don't have a very big political lever, we're nice guys.
Paul Henderson

The spineless pussy willows in Ottawa are actually helping to condition the Canadian public to accept the surrender of our country, which American forces were unable to accomplish in 1776 and 1812.
Paul Hellyer


And, of course, let's not forget the official slogan for Molson's Canadian: 'I Am Canadian'!

Send feedback!

Have any ideas you want to send to the owner of this website? Use the form below.

Note: All submissions become property of Patriotism Canada, and may be posted. Please fill in your name as your would like it to appear should your feedback become content on this web site. Otherwise, indicate that you wish to be anonymous.

     Name : 
     Email: 
            (if you want a reply)
  Feedback:
  
   
  
View Canadian Jokes!